Trump's Tower
March 4, 2016.
I wish I was a stand-up comedian today.
I don't know if you heard, but last night, Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump assured the crowd at a nationally televised debate that his "little fella" wasn't so little at all. That means the Donald Jr. was probably the fifth biggest dick on the stage last night.
Already twice this week, Trump has backtracked on things he's said. First, he had to announce that he doesn't support the Ku Klux Klan. Then, he changed his mind about torture and killing the families of terrorists. How long till he's saying his junk isn't as jumbo as he had us believe?
Obviously, this guy has some issues with the size of his manhood, which would explain why he wants to put his name on so many skyscrapers. Is this someone we really want in charge of nuclear missiles?
Imagine a general walking in and telling him, "Mr. President, Kim Jong Un said you have snubby fingers." "Oh yeah?" (*whistling sound and then a big explosion*)
I never thought the size of someone's manhood was a qualification for president, although that might explain some of America's voting record, and also why we elected folks named Johnson, Dick and Jimmy all in a row.
Seriously, by his reasoning, porn stars are more qualified than Trump to be president.
Then again, porn stars are more qualified than Trump to be president.
Now, if you found any of this vulgar, remember that last night the front-runner for president of the United States talked about these subjects in front of millions of people. I don't think I'm the one who crossed the line.
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